Houdini isn't dead....

.....he was just reincarnated as a goat. Sammy, our older goat, is the more adventurous of the two. Early this week, I was in Roanoke, but Sharon came home to neighbors telling the tale of seeing Sammy walk across their yards, peering in their windows, and then wrestling him back into his pen. Last night, I came home to first spot goat poop on the walk and then see Sammy trotting up my neighbor's yard. We first thought he was escaping by climbing up a wood pile in their pen (which was probably the case the first time), but it looks as if he escaped yesterday by pushing against the chain link and squeezing under. The fence has now been reinforced with tension wire at the bottom, so let's see if that holds back the mystical wonder goat.

As many of you may know, I'm in an unemployed state right now. I won't go into it here, as it is a pretty tense thing between me and my previous employer. However, I have some very good prospects out there, but they are both corporate entities, and they tend to take a long time in the hiring process.

John and I have now spent about 3 quality months together, and it's evident that we've bonded closer in that time. When I'm working full time, I only see him for 30 minutes or less in the morning and maybe 2 hours at night (if I'm lucky). I need to get back to work, but I will miss the time with him. He just turned two, and is growing up waaaaaay too fast!

Sharon has her next doctor's visit Monday, and this is the all-important boy or girl ultrasound! I'll let everyone know!

I'm still alive....

I bet you were starting to wonder, eh?

Not much time for a lengthy blog now, but since I last typed, I've / we've......

1-Been to Florida
2-Been to the beach
3-Quasi-finished the kitchen
4-Assembled a playset for John
5-Created a new pen for the goats
6-Found out some very exciting news
7-Been planning a high school reunion
8-Been planning a 2nd birthday party
9-Adopted a puppy
10-Been searching for a new job (me)
11-Held band camp (Sharon)
12-Been working on my first side design project
13-Started back at work (Sharon)

Let's see....those are the highlights. I'll catch everyone up soon!

I feel like Bob Vila.

We started renovating our kitchen this past weekend (one of the reasons I've been too busy to write for a while - we have been doing lots to prepare). I won't call it a total "gutting," but it was close in some aspects. I'll have to post pictures soon - during the demo, we found 5-6 different wall and ceiling treatments buried, including several "lovely" wallpaper patterns. Essentially, we have rebuilt the ceiling and one wall, and are adding a few new cabinets, countertops, fridge, sink, fixtures, backsplash, and paint.

Completed over the past 3 days - rip out old ceiling and wall, hang new drywall, tape and mud (1st coat), install base cabinets, install countertop substrate (we are installing a marble tile countertop), add 2 new receptacles and one switch, add 5 new lighting fixtures, and rewire 2 receptacles and 1 switch.

To complete - 2nd and 3rd coats of mud, priming and paint, install backer board for countertop, install tile for countertop, install tile backsplash, install wall cabinets and panty, hang pendant lights and seal countertop.

Phew! What are we doing when we are finished? Going to Disneyworld, of course! :)

Arggh!

No, I'm not imitating a pirate. I'm frustrated with my recent string of bad luck.

Our lawnmower wouldn't start after the winter. I took it to a shop in Christiansburg that ripped me off by charging me $28 to tell me that it needed a new carberetor ($130) and that there was nothing else they could do. So, at a friend's suggestion, I took it to a gentlemen in Floyd who is retired and has a small repair business. One week and $25 later, a good cleanout has the lawnmower running like a champ (without a NEW carberetor, mind you). These rip-off artists in Christiansburg will be hearing from me today.

So, I load up the lawnmower in Floyd, and my truck won't start. I get one thing fixed, and another goes bad. Always seems to work that way. So, it took two trucks to get the lawnmower home last night - my truck on top of a tow truck.

Things can only go up from here, right?

Haha.

Happy Friday everyone! I was at Sharon's band retreat Monday, so I technically only had a 4-day workweek this week. What a difference a day makes - the week seemed to fly by! I can't believe it's May already - in 3-4 weeks we will start renovating our kitchen, and in 7 weeks we leave for Florida!

Now, I love comedy and a good joke. I, however, am not one for toilet humor. Leave the fart jokes and what not out - they typically will turn me off of your act pretty quick. However, I did see this bumper sticker on a truck at the park and ride, and I thought it was hilarious.


Don't we all feel like that sometimes? :)

It's Friday!

Seems like the weeks have been flying by, which is a good thing. I'm wearing the "car salesman" Hawaiian shirt today (pale yellow with sage green leaves and darker yellow palm trees) - it's one of my favorites, but maybe just slightly tacky. Sharon actually was surprised that I didn't put John in a Hawaiian shirt this morning (he has two) - he participated last week :) What does your Hawaiian shirt look like?

This weekend looks to be beautiful, which is a GREAT thing. I think Sharon is attending an event in Roanoke tomorrow, so perhaps the little monster and I will take a good bike ride.

I'm a little nervous - Sharon is conduction a spring retreat for all of her band kids this weekend (grades 6-12) and has invited various industry "professionals" to come and present seminars, workshops, and masterclasses. She has musicians from the Roanoke Symphony, ensembles from Radford University and Virginia Tech, and students from both universities coming - and me. I was asked early on, at the suggestion of a Tech professor, to give a seminar on leadership. Those who know me know that I love to talk and be in front of people, doing such on many previous occasions. However, I've never had to put a 90-minute seminar together before for young students, so it should be interesting - wish me luck! If you have any important leadership ideas or tips, feel free to email them to me!

Felix Felicis...please!

For the non-Harry Potter nerds out there, that would be a bottle of luck potion, of which I am in dire need right now. I can't remember a more stressful or unlucky period in my recent (or total) memory.

Let's see.....both personal and work computers got hit with the conflicker worm and I've had to reformat both. I've got a cat who is spraying all over the house. I've got a rat in the basement that is uncatchable. I've got a 2-year old lawnmower that won't start. I've got a high school reunion to plan that I don't have time to devote to. On top of all of this, I have a job for which I haven't been paid now for 1 MONTH.

I've eluded to it before, but I am in a dire search for a new job. I'm still employed (apparently for free), but the recession has hit us extremely hard, and the company is running on fumes. I've been getting my paychecks typically two weeks late, and now I'm due two checks. Pretty hard to deal with when you have a little one and you live check to check as it is. The really bad thing is that there are virtually NO open jobs out there right now. I might have to resort to pulling out my CDL and cruising around on the BT again!

So, I don't mean to be a Debbie Downer here, but like many others in this crisis, I could use some extra prayers right now. Hopefully something will break soon!

And hopefully that rat will meet his swift death.

Your results:
You are Spider-Man

Spider-Man 75% Iron Man 70% Green Lantern 65% Hulk 60% The Flash 60% Superman 55% Robin 45% Supergirl 45% Catwoman 40% Wonder Woman 35% Batman 15%

You are intelligent, witty, a bit geeky and have great power and responsibility.

Click here to take the Superhero Personality Quiz

Uhhh.....hmm....

Sharon had given me several candy bars on my birthday, and a "Hershey's Skor" bar was one of them. I've never had one before.

I was waiting for the bus this morning, and was looking through the ingredients list (don't know why, so don't ask). In the ingredients list for "milk chocolate" is "nonfat milk," immediately followed by "milk fat."

Umm....I'm sure there is a scientific reason for this, but.....what?!

Advances in medical science....

....seem to be lagging in certain areas!

Case in point: I had to go for my yearly eye exam this morning, and the optometrist dialated my eyes for the exam. This was at 10:15 a.m. It is now 1:45, my eyes are still dialated, and I'm staring at a fuzzy computer screen.

My question: if medical science can create drops to dialate my eyes, why can't they create drops to un-dialate them when the good doctor is done?

Due to the fuzzy screen, it should be really interesting to review my drawings once my vision is clear again ;)

Happy Friday!

Party on, Wayne.

Party on, Garth.

To goat, or not to goat....

....that is the question. Sorry for that awful attempt at a Shakespearean joke.

The breeder that we got our goats from has had 14 kids born in the past two weeks and has 12 left - 6 male and 6 female. Of course, he keeps trying to get me to "increase my herd," so he sent photos and wants us to stop by. If I had more land, I would have 10-20. On our land, we could easily support 1-2 more, but you're getting into more of a farming operation at that point rather than just having them solely as pets. Not that it's more expensive - the cost difference between 3 or 4 and two is very minimal, if even noticeable. The thing is that our two goats are "weathers," meaning castrated males, and really only useful as pets. Bucks are smelly and can be territorial with other males, and since I'm not breeding, I don't really want one. A doe would be great, but #1 - they're expensive, and #2 - I can't commit to a milking schedule. However, does are what are typically shown at goat shows / 4H events (which we would like John to do).

So, to goat or not to goat?

(sorry again)

I'm building my next house on stilts!

If one more person tells me "we need the rain," I'm going to snap. If you need the rain so bad, bring a bucket or twelve and help yourself, because apparently the rain that everyone else so badly needs is in my basement.

We've never had a problem with water in the basement before except for the few times where the drain at the bottom of the basement stair (which is outside) was blocked with leaves, making the water run into the basement. Well, apparently the ground is SUPER saturated due to all the melted snow from two weeks ago and the 3 (now 4) consecutive days of rain, and it couldn't take any more.

We came home from breakfast yesterday morning and I noticed the basement stair landing was full of water, and it had flowed (rather substantially) into the basement. Well, I shop-vac'd the water out of the landing, but it NEVER STOPPED. Turns out, water was spewing out of the drain like Old Faithful.

So, I plug the drain with a rag and vacuum the water out. Well, that must have built up some pressure, because then water starts seeping through cracks in the floor close to the door. Additionally, I had water coming through other cracks on the far end of the basement.

So, we put EVERYTHING up in the basement on blocks and set up a siphon hose running from the landing to the sump basin and pump. Water ran continuously for about 10 hours yesterday. It was ok this morning, but I'm sure it will be flooded again this afternoon.

Forget rain, I need drought!

Sad, sad....

Being the Sesame Street / Muppets fan that I am, I thought I'd share this news story, taken directly from http://www.tmz.com/:

Economy Rocks Sesame Street, Layoffs Ensue
Posted Mar 11th 2009 4:26PM by TMZ Staff
First Wall St ... then Main St ... now the economy is taking its toll on Sesame St. Sunny days could not sweep the clouds away ... and now the good people behind the world's greatest children's show have announced they must regretfully cut their workforce by 20% -- 67 positions in total. The letters of the day are B and S. When not asked to weigh in on the situation, Kermit the Frog responded by throwing up his hands, and screaming the following statement: "Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh"

Sad thing is that this story is true (though the humor was added for fun by TMZ).

Another funny one....

Happy Friday! Here's another funny one for your weekend - the PG version of an email that Dad sent to me. Enjoy!

A man in the Safeway Store tries to buy half a head of lettuce. The very young produce assistant tells him that they sell only whole heads of lettuce. The man persists and asks to see the manager. The boy says he'll ask his manager about it.

Walking into the back room, the boy said to his manager, 'Some moron wants to buy half a head of lettuce.' As he finished his sentence, he turned to find the man standing right behind him, so he added, 'And this gentleman has kindly offered to buy the other half.'

The manager approved the deal, and the man went on his way. Later the manager said to the boy, 'I was impressed with the way you got yourself out of that situation earlier. We like people who think on their feet here. Where are you from, son?'

'Canada , sir,' the boy replied.

'Well, why did you leave Canada?' the manager asked.

The boy said, 'Sir, there's nothing but trashy women and hockey players up there.'

'Really?' said the manager. 'My wife is from Canada .'

'Holy cow!' replied the boy. 'Who'd she play for?'

Home Security

Dad emailed this to me, and I thought it was too funny not to post, especially in these hard economic times.......

How to install a home security system...

1. Go to the Goodwill Store and buy a pair of men's work boots, size 14 -16 (well used).
2. Place them on the front porch along with a copy of Gun and Ammo magazine.
3. Put a couple of BIG dog dishes next to the boots and magazine.
4. Leave a handwritten note on your door that reads: "Hey Bubba! Big Jim, Duke, Slim and Me went for more ammo...be back in about 1 hour. Don't mess with the pit bulls--they got after the mailman this morning and messed him up real bad. I don't think Killer took part in it, but it was hard to tell from all the blood. Anyway, I locked all the dogs in the house. Just wait outside til we get back. -Cooter"

Funny thing - this would probably work in my neighborhood.

M.I.A.?

I'm doing it again - going missing for days and weeks at a time on the blog. I'm surprised anyone still reads it.

Or do they :) ?

Anyways, it's been super-crazy lately. Hokie had his follow-up with the vet, and it looks like we dodged a major bullet - he seems to be fine with no permanant damage. Please let everyone you know that has dogs about this very potential danger.

Random stream-of-consciousness note: it just started snowing outside! There was no snow anywhere in the forecast for today!? I need spring!

So anyways, there's been lots going on lately that I don't want to talk about just yet, but I will reveal in time (how's that for suspense). Don't get worried though, it's nothing to do with family, kids, or my general existence :) Once I get some things in motion, I will be more relaxed and will hopefully have more time to keep up with everything else.

As a final note, I will plea to my Atlanta Braves to PLEASE sign somebody worthwhile! First, we let Teixeira go, then Smoltz, and now we've lost our shot at Griffey. Please, I don't want us to stink again this year. MLB is already turning me off, and you the only organization that makes me hold on. Don't blow it.

Spring....maybe?

A random observation - I heard the birds singing the other morning! Now, either that means that Spring is right around the corner, or that the birds are pretty stupid and are going to freeze when winter sets back in (which according to the weather report, will happen next week). I would like to think it's the former - I absolutely love Spring.

When I was younger (even up until a few years ago), I looked forward to winter. I liked colder weather, and I liked the prospect of snow. As I become a grouchier old man (ha), I find myself cursing winter and wishing I was as intelligent as those birds, flying south for the winter. I still get excited when we get a good snowfall, but that excitement quickly wanes when I realize I'm not longer eligible for snow days ;)

I enjoy it being light when I leave for work in the morning, and the hint of light that is starting to stick around when I get home. I look forward to getting out the lawnmower and tiller and getting to work on the yard and garden. I look forward to being able to let both little monsters (the two-legged and four-legged ones) outside to run and play.

But really, I mostly look forward to my hawaiian shirts and my tiki torches.

I'm sure we'll have to freeze through a few more weeks first.

Hokie's home!

After a tense end-of-the-week, we finally got to bring Hokie home yesterday, and he seemed very happy to see us! He responded well to the overall treatment, but we had some scares when his blood sugar kept dropping every time they took him off the IV. However, the sugar stablized, and they released him yesterday morning. He is on three different medications for the next couple of weeks, and he will have to go back to the vet in a week for more tests to make sure everything is looking ok. We will have to keep a detailed check on him for a while to make sure his glucose levels are good and his liver is ok.

So PLEASE, spread the word to all the dog owners you know about the dangers of xylitol. We are among the few lucky ones; if we had not called the vet, or if the nurse didn't ask the vet about the gum, we may have lost him that first night. This looks to be one of the most toxic poisions to dogs that is very commonly around the house. The treatment, if they catch it soon enough to be effective, is long, taxing, and VERY expensive.

I think that in 20 or 30 years, we ourselves are going to realize that all of these artificial sweeteners and such are causing us more damage than good. I think I'll stick with good ole' bubble yum and big league chew from now on :)

Hokie update

Hokie is through his first night at the vet and seems to be doing well. I talked with the vet last night, and it sounds like it was a good thing we got him in as quick as we did. His blood sugar had dropped (they are now keeping that stabilized), and the "toxic" enzyme in his liver was elevated, though it was still at a readable level (the vet said that during extremely dangerous cases of this, the enzyme level will be off the charts). We still aren't in the clear yet as far as liver damage as it can take 12-72 hours for the enzyme levels to peak. They are keeping him on an IV, trying to flush out his system. He will be hooked up for three days, after which we can hopefully bring him home. He seems to be happy and is spreading his love at the office :)

I'll update again after I talk with the vet this morning.

A VERY serious post.

We've all heard about how chocolate is toxic to dogs. There are many other items, such as grapes and raisins, that can be just as harmful. However, we got hit with a new one today. Hokie got into a pack of chewing gum, and was throwing up later. I called the vet, and the nurse on the phone said that he should be ok if he was throwing it up - not a big deal. I hung up, and my phone rang again in less than a minute. She had talked to the vet, and then asked me if the gum had xylitol in it. Well, we usually only buy Trident, which uses xylitol as their primary sweetener. She told us the vet wanted us to bring Hokie in right away.

I looked it up, and xylitol is extremely poisionous to dogs. Just one stick, if fully ingested, can be enough to kill a small dog if not immediately treated. What it does, among other things, is drop a dog's blood sugar level to a dangerously low level. It can also cause permanant liver and kidney damage.

Hokie is at the vet where he has already had blood tests and is on an IV. Before anyone panics and over-reacts, he seems to be doing well and is in "good spirits." Since he threw up so much, we hope he got most all of it out of his system. I will hear back from the vet tonight - Hokie will probably be at the vet for 3 days for observation and to make sure all of the toxins are out of his system.

SO (my main reason for posting this), please watch your dogs and watch where you keep gum and other toxins. No matter how well they are trained, most dogs will think it's food for them and will go for it. I will keep the blog updated on Hokie's progress.

Vegas Top 20

So, Vegas was awesome. Instead of outlining my trip in a narrative paragraph, I thought I would present you with a "top 20 Vegas observations list" :)

1 - Vegas is awesome, but is definitely not for everyone.

2 - The $1.99 shrimp cocktail at the Golden Gate is the best deal in Vegas.

3 - Casinos will take you a lot more seriously if you have an expensive cigar, but also carrying a 2 foot margarita kind of cancels that out.

4 - Roulette is the best casino game EVER (if you win).

5 - J.B. and slots do NOT get along, unless the slot machine is obnoxiously huge.

6 - Jay Leno is even more hilarious in person.

7 - Jimmy Buffett rules, but the Vegas Margaritaville kinda stinks (go to the Myrtle Beach one).

8 - Be prepared for extensive fighting and profanity in rooms next to yours.

9 - If you aren't into female "escorts" (ie., prostitutes), avoid the 10 thousand mexican guys handing out "literature" in front of EVERY CASINO.

10 - "The Deuce" is a GREAT idea.

11 - Video poker at the bar is NEVER a good idea.

12 - All fancy casinos look the same inside, and all the cheap ones look the same. See one, see 'em all.

13 - Cirque du Soleil's KA has the most incredible theater and stage. EVER.

14 - No matter what they try to sell you on, Vegas is NOT a place to take the kids.

15 - 70 degree weather in the middle of January = awesome.

16 - The casinos spend your money well - the resorts are absolutely incredible and huge.

17 - Get used to the "casino smell." With the exception of the Bellagio and the Venetian, they all smell the same.

18 - Many dealers don't have much of a sense of humor. I tried.

19 - Don't ever answer anyone who comes up to you and says "can I ask you a question?" Guess what.....you just did.

20 - There are slot machines waiting to greet you in the airport, and I won pretty well on one. (this is an exception to the earlier rule)

So, it was a lot of fun. 3 days was about the most we could take, and there are LOTS of things that we didn't do or see, so a return trip is a definite.

Nice day to be a polar bear....

Brrrrr! I don't think it's been this cold outside since, well, forever. I thought that I had hit my cold record last January when I went ice fishing in Minnesota - the temperature (not windchill, regular temperature) registered -22 while I was there. However, there wasn't any wind and the sun was shining - that felt warmer than what I felt outside today. I bet it's (a little) warmer in Vegas.....

That's right...in one week I will be landing in Vegas to enjoy my Christmas present from Sharon! My buddy Jerry and I will be staying at the Circus Circus at the north end of the strip. I'm not a big gambler, though I have been studying blackjack basic strategy and am hoping to hit the tables for a bit. This is a guys trip, so the ladies will be back at home. We have tickets to see Jay Leno, and there will also be the required Margaritaville stop. Beyond that, we will let the cards fall as they will (pun intended). I've never been before, so more than anything, I'm excited just to see everything - to see how they spend the money they take from us :)

I'll definitely hit the highlights when I return!

Text Messaging, Part Deux

So, Sharon called today and was telling me how she confiscated two cell phones during school today because kids were text messaging.

Now, I'm probably making myself sound old here, but since when are kids allowed to have phones during school anyways? When I was in high school (yes, cell phones were around then), it was an AUTOMATIC suspension if you were even seen with a phone, much less if was on or not. I remember one time that I forgot and had my pager (remember those?) on when I walked into school - I was terrified that a teacher might have seen me.

So, if you disagree with me, or if you are one of these teenage texting maniacs, please answer me this. What is SO important in your current phase of life that requires you to text someone right that minute, instead of waiting until after school to have a CONVERSATION (meaning two people TALKING face to face)? I don't remember cell phone usage being part of the instructional curriculum.

Teachers - take every cell phone you see come out during class.

Students - hang up and learn something.

I'm still alive....

So, I hope everyone had a great Christmas and a very happy New Year. We had a great holiday, and John was a blast. Not to sound materialistic or selfish, but I think this was the best "present" holiday ever! I ended up with a GPS system, a Wii (for both myself and Sharon), some new movies and other things, and a trip to Vegas at the end of January (from Sharon - more on that later)!

But anyways.....it's time for my first "observation" of the year - TEXT MESSAGING. I don't want to sound like an old guy who is out of touch with technology, but I think that the whole text messaging craze has gotten RIDICULOUS. It's flat out rude at times. When you are with or around other people (ie., hanging out, at the mall, etc.), put the phone down. Better yet, leave it in the car. While I am an avid cell phone user, I think that the "convenience" has made us go waaaay overboard with things like this. I'm not talking about the occasional texters; I'm referring to those whose phones never quite seem to close. Sometimes, I yearn for the old land-line phones and answering machines (minus the telemarketers). If I'm not home, I will just talk to you later. End of story.

I'm also thrilled to see that the legislation for smoke-free restaurants is back before the delegates again, although I don't think it will ever pass. Smokers constantly talk about their right to smoke, but your right stops where it infringes on mine, habit or not. How would you like it if someone with Tourette syndrome sat down next to you smokers in a bar and and spontaneously shouted obscenities in your ear all night? It would get annoying, wouldn't it? Seems to me that it is the same as you blowing your smoke in my face. You don't ever think about the health of those who are serving you either, do you? So delegates, please put the tobacco companies aside and pass this legislation. Smokers will find another place to smoke.

Maybe then they will also ban text messaging.